Story of my life

If I am to tell my story
I'd rather live in hell
My painful song isn't that worthy
Its soul lies in a cell
What should I ask to have an answer?
Cause my beliefs are wrong
And now I am on a stage...but I'm a lonely dancer
And yet I am still asking, to whom do I belong?

My mind is full of darkness but I am still alive
Keep thinking without sleeping, cause I'm afraid of nightmares
I wonder what is faith?Who do I have to strike?
I need to know for sure...who's answering my prayers?
My reasons for my actions are far from being solved
My motivating self is lost in time and motion
Nothing can change me now, my soul is still involved
In sorrow and regrets and powerful emotion
A chance to freeze my time is yet impossible
A life without a living is like an empty bottle
I tried to be that person nice and likable
I noticed I solve nothing, I keep blocking myself
I must awake my evil part, my desire for cold blood
I'll leave my innocence and heart on a broken shelf
I will embrace my darkness and I won't fall in mud
I will feed my pain with hate and deadly poison
I'll be a restless warrior with a wild calling for killing
You know I won't be merciful. I'm thinking like a lion
The torture won't be easy, it will be slow and thrilling.

The story of my life will be an endless nightmare
For those who'll try to stop me, fulfilling my desires
My anger is my weapon and yet I deeply swear
Someday I might return to my ball of fire
Full of beliefs and faith, hope and happiness
Maybe I will bring back my beating heart and smile
Maybe I will forget my thoughts and sadness
I will go back in time and hope this won't be worthless.

Different path

I've been covered by mistake for too long
I need to change some things, especially my song
I have to change my vision and my path
I must change my life's fancy hat
Uncertainty is hanging with spinning messy thoughts
I'll be a slave to failure if I will pay the costs.
I'll lose everything I've earned, judging the wrong I did
If I won't be bright enough to take the perfect bid
Everything I had should be left behind
My principles, beliefs, totally declined.

My past and everything in it, should burn down into ashes
My memories should fade away before my present crashes
Everything I was before should be covered in darkness
And hope should give me wigs to fly around my conscience.
I will embrace the new path which is not that far
Because I feel I'm strong enough to focus on my star
I'm capable of greater things, to prove myself worthy
I have a future in front of me for which I'm feeling ready.

Incomplete

                                                                                                  

It feels like empty people walk away in sand
And yet my heart is drowning in cold blood.
I hate it when strange voices, keep telling me to raise a hand
To hope for something incomplete, already buried in mud.
I don't want to face this world alone, to break my every tear
I'm just a fragile soul, not even half of stone...
Stuck in time and years...

My darling, ouh my love, If only I could show you
That you're the blood pulsing my heart
If you would let me show you that I can give you something new
If only you knew, my love, that I can't live apart.

Not even the greatest fiddler can't sing my strongest love
There are no words invented for what I am and feel
No one will ever know what I am thinking of
Because my strongest will is like a heart of steel.

I'd rather die alone, than living without you
I'd rather forget myself and lose myself in darkness
I'd rather give away my soul, than not be loved by you
I'd rather go blind forever, than living in cold madness.

New roads to walk

Never look back when a big change arrives
Always embrace a chance that suddenly strikes
When you wish upon a star for something big to happen
You have to wait a while, it comes all of a sudden.

Believe in what you are and fight for what you want
Cause live is full of darkness and yet is relevant
But still there is that shinny hope that lives inside your heart
You have in mind new roads to walk and new friendships to start.

Tales of some thoughs

I learned a lot of things, dear reader
And still I kept my sorrow...
I wished for a better life, my dear
Still waiting for tomorrow...
My youth is blind and full of uncertainty
My mind is flying over seas and mountains...
But I forgot my innocence and now I'm feeling tirsty,
And life is like a scene with actors, without a crowd and curtains.
...................
Mistakes I made, a lot of them
..and yet I lost some battles
I paid, I learned and here I am...
Still carying my candles.
A woman's heart is strong enough
To walk through life and death
And yet her soul is wildly rough
Until she gives her last breath.
....
I wish to be wise enough,to pass over dusty thoughts
I wish to have a better luck, I wish to see things clearer
I keep my faith tight enough and keep holding on the knots
'Cause getting back my strenght is like regaining my heart's mirror....